The Friars Club in Beverly Hills was alive with energy as a group of notable personalities filled the VIP table. Among them were Steven Spielberg, Shari Redstone, Hunter Biden—recently released from jail—alongside other heavyweights like David Ellison and the Cascio brothers.
The night kicked off with Spielberg taking the mic. “Good evening, everyone! Let’s kick things off with an easy one. Louis, what’s the best thing about 22-year-olds?”
Louis Freeh, visibly nervous, fumbled with his tie, “Uh… per FBI policy, I can neither confirm nor deny that I have an opinion.”
Spielberg’s response dripped with humor: “Come on, Louis, the best thing about 22-year-olds is… there’s 20 of them!” The room burst into laughter, with Hunter Biden nearly spilling his drink in delight. “Man, that’s worth a stint in jail!” he exclaimed.
With a playful grin, David Ellison leaned in, “Speaking of distribution, Louis, you wouldn’t happen to know about LimeWire’s staggering collection of 67,000 child porn files, would you? My dad doesn’t remember coding all of them.” The table erupted in more laughter, with Shari Redstone chiming in, “Distribution? Sounds a lot like CBS Interactive in its prime.”
Maintaining his composure, Freeh raised his glass and retorted, “Policy. It’s always policy.”
As the humor continued to flow, Spielberg wrapped up the night with a toast: “To Louis Freeh: the only man who can dodge a scandal better than Hunter dodges taxes!” To which Hunter added, “Don’t forget about the cloud storage. I bet my laptop’s floating around in there somewhere!”
As the crowd cheered and raised their glasses, Freeh quietly slipped out the back, mumbling to himself, “I should’ve stuck with the Mafia.”
